Ranking all the 2020 Theatrically Released Horror Movies

[Kyle]

My plan is systematically rank all the horror movie theatrically released (in the US) in 2020 and listed as (at least partially) being in the horror genre on Box Office Mojo. For the movies I've already seen, I will rank them and separately provide a short review. For those I haven't seen, I will eventually watch them (hopefully this year) and include them in the ranking with a short review after I have done so. Note: I'm not including horror movies that were re-released into theaters in 2020 (like The Shining, or It, or The Giant Spider Invasion).

I anticipate this will be a smaller list than 2019.

THE RANKINGS
Color Out of Space (1/24/20)
Becky (6/5/20)
Come to Daddy (2/7/20)
The Hunt (3/13/20)
Gretel and Hansel (1/31/20)
The Lodge (2/7/20)
Relic (7/3/20)
Beneath Us (3/6/20)
Underwater (1/10/20)
True Fiction (2/21/20)
The Wretched (5/1/20)
The Invisible Man (2/28/20)
Fantasy Island (2/14/20)
The Rental (7/24/20)
We Summon the Darkness (5/22/20)
The Other Lamb (4/3/20)
The Turning (1/24/20)
Cruel Peter (3/13/20)
Brahms: The Boy 2 (2/21/20)
The Grudge (1/3/20)

UNWATCHED
Extra Ordinary (3/6/20)
Followed (6/19/20)
Peninsula (8/7/20)
Sputnik (8/4/20)
The New Mutants (8/28/20)
Fear Pharm (9/11/20)
No Escape (9/18/20)
Shortcut (9/25/20)
12-Hour Shift (10/2/20)
The Call (10/2/20)
Possessor (10/2/20)

[Kyle]

The Grudge- I'm not going to waste much time on this. So boring. So dumb. So slow. Edited poorly to make parts incoherent. Y'all it was just so bad. As a fan of the Sam Raimi version with Buffy, I knew this wouldn't hit me the same way that one did (or even would now given that it probably hasn't aged well). But I expected something better than this movie, which was essentially a rehash of old territory, but without any style, panache or uniqueness. Almost turned it off halfway through.

Fantasy Island- Confession time. I love almost all things Blumhouse. They're trashy. They're often really dumb. But more often than not they're a lot of fun. And that's what this movie was- dumb fun. The plot was convoluted and didn't make much sense, but you kind of expect that with Fantasy Island, right? (If you don't know the original show, I won't belabor it here- but it's an island where your fantasy's come true in a monkey paw way.) The young cast was clearly having a lot of fun in their roles and I found myself more than once being proud of thinking I had a twist figured out (but I didn't). The one drawback to this film was Michael Pena playing Mr. Rourke. It's like he was told, "Don't emote. Not once. Say everything like your face is paralyzed and you don't give a shit about it." He was pretty bad. But look- it's dumb fun and I can appreciate that.

The Invisible Man- Controversy! Everyone I know that's seen this movie liked it a lot. A whole lot. It was just... aight. Here's the first thing, and I need to contextualize it- I'm a huge fan of Elizabeth Moss. I think she's great in every roll that she has. She's a stellar actress that deserves all the accolades she gets. But I felt like she was miscast here. The whole first half I'm watching this, I'm thinking, "Really Elizabeth Moss? So you're... whatever." But halfway through I got through that. Here's the other big thing: this movie had to telegraph everything that was going to happen by smashing you in the face and then explaining to you that "this thing" was going to be important later. It bothered me and made large sections seem boring because I kept waiting for "the thing" to re-emerge. And here's the last thing. I mean, look-- it's an invisible man movie. And the interesting premise to put their spin on this was to sell it to us as a "is there really an invisible man or is it just in her head?" And the first third of the movie sets this up real well. And I'm not going to give spoilers, but I'll just say that the second two-thirds of the movie sucked because of this.

Gretel and Hansel- Head's up: my wife hated this movie and I really liked it. So mileage may vary. This movie is a retelling of Hansel and Gretel (as you may have suspected). I was excited to see it because it was directed by Oz Perkins (son of Anthony Perkins a/k/a the actor in Psycho). Perkins made two other artsy horror movies that I really liked: The Blackcoat's Daughter and I Am The Pretty Thing That Lives In The House. Knowing his pedigree, I was prepared for this to be an art-house horror movie. And boy was it! And I loved every second of it! Unfortunately I didn't prepare my wife who thought it was just kind of slow and boring. This movie wasn't without flaws, though. The lead actress (Gretel) was Sophia Lilllis (from It) and her performance was... okay. She kept trying to do an accent that came and went and it was really distracting. The actor that played Hansel was... not as good as Lillis. So there were parts of the movie that were a little cringey. However, the whole look of the movie was a beautiful visage of rot and decay. It was so glorious on the screen. And Perkins' witch was creepy as hell. I really liked this movie, but go into it knowing it's an art movie.

The Hunt- Holy shit I enjoyed this movie! It's not anything new- it's the old "Most Dangerous Game"/Man Hunting movie. It stars Betty Gilpin (GLOW) as a red state person being hunted by a group led by Hillary Swank (Million Dollar Baby) as an elite liberal. Knowing what you're getting into, you don't expect much and just hope it's going to be a fun ride. And it was. But it was also really smart and really funny. The whole family laughed hard at multiple scenes. And despite the grief this movie got for being anti-conservative, it's actually apolitical. Listen, I won't give anything away. Just go watch it. Great movie.

Color Out of Space- This movie will definitely be in my top 5 by the time this year is up. Nick Cage going full Cage. Richard Stanley making his comeback. Lovecraft source material. It's a simple plot, family lives on farm when a meteorite strikes their back yard. Over the next several things, reality bends and sanity retreats. You'll remember Richard Stanley as the notorious burn out director that got blacklisted after he was fired from the set of The Island of Dr. Moreau (life advice- watch the documentary about the shenanigans between Val Kilmer, Stanley and Marlon Brando during the filming of that movie- it's called Lost Soul: The Doomed Journey of Richard Stanley's Island of Dr. Moreau- you won't regret it). This movie proves that he really was a brilliant talent. Even if you don't care for full on Cage, watch this movie for the beautiful, morose pallor that slowly infects each frame. It starts so simply and then becomes batshit bananas by the end. So well done. I love this movie.

[Zombie]

I am surprisingly up to date on 2020 horror. We turned off the Grudge before finishing. We rarely do that but this movie is that bad.

[Kyle]

The Lodge- I hated this movie, until I liked it a bunch. As I've discussed before, the pace balance for slow-burn movies is difficult to get right. And this movie, which is a slow burn for the first hour is too slow. Way too slow. But then the last 30 minutes go batshit and does a lot to make up for how boring the first 2/3 were. The plot revolves around a recently divorced dad who takes his new fiancee and two kids to a mountain cabin for Christmas. I don't want to give it away, but weird things start happening. And then in the last half hour- it's holy shit time.The movie stars my favorite hidden in plain sight decedent of Elvis Presley- Riley Keough (she's Lisa Marie's daughter) as the fiancee. For much of the movie it's just her and the two kids- Lia McHugh and Jaeden Martel (who you'll recognize from the It movies. Here's the thing- the two kids give acting performances that elevate this movie to be much better than it deserves. Keough does a fine job too, but given my expectations of child actors, I was a little floored by their performances. There's not much more I can say about this deeply flawed movie (don't think about it too much after it's over) without spoiling it. But I really enjoyed it and can easily recommend it.

[Kyle]

Brahms: The Boy 2- I don't know what I expected. I didn't like The Boy, so why did I think this one would be okay? Was it because of Katie Holmes? Was it because dolls are creepy? I don't know. This was just so bad. Katie Holmes is... okay. Everyone else, especially the kid, is terrible. And I guess it's hard to get around this in creepy doll movies but- GET RID OF THE DOLL! I don't understand why they don't burn the doll up the first time they think it's evil. I mean, you came to the conclusion that a doll... A DOLL... is evil. But you're going to use a "wait and see" approach? No. Nope. Never. But I guess that makes for a short, terrible movie. Anyhow- a big skip on this one.

[Kyle]

The Turning- So I recently watched both this and the Boy 2, and I keep mixing them up when I'm reviewing them because they are both so bad and forgettable. But this one is only a hair better than the Boy 2, but still awful and something you shouldn't watch. It's based on a favorite short story of mine- the Turning of the Screw- which has much, much better film adaptations of it than this. This movie, without spoiling anything, really has a bad, unique take on the material and it ruins it. Basic premise is that this nanny comes to this old mansion to watch two kids and then the house is haunted and weird stuff happens. The original story was a big "is it real or in her head" and this movie abandons that altogether- it's real, yo. And you don't really care. What makes this movie worse is Finn Wolfhard as the older brother. I really liked him in the first season of stranger things and in the first It movie. But then he started doing more seasons of stranger things, and it's clear that he just has one shtick and he keeps doing it. And as he gets older, it gets worse and more cringey. He has some weird psycho-sexual creepy thing he's doing in this movie and it doesn't work. It's hard to be scared of a 15 year old (I don't know how old he really was when he filmed, but that's how old he looks) that looks like he weighs 87 pounds and has Howard Stern's haircut. When he tries to be scary, I keep thinking, "Just slap his face and he'll crumple to the ground. You're a grown assed adult, nanny! Act like one." I'm giving this movie too much credit by even writing this much about it. Just skip it.

[Kyle]

Underwater- Confession. Even though I hate the Twilight movies, I'm a big fan of Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart's work in indie movies after they were done with those. For Pattinson, do yourself a favor and watch Good Time, the Lighthouse or High Life. In any of those movies, he puts on an acting clinic and is so good to watch. For Kristen Stewart, I'm a big fan of her unstated performances in things like Personal Shopper and American Ultra. And as Mimekiller once said, she's got the best ears in the business. Underwater is an action/horror movie where something happens to start a gigantic underwater drilling complex imploding. Kristen Stewart and a handful of survivors rush from crumbling section to crumbling section to try to find a way back to the surface before the strange events destroy everything. It's pretty tense and the action is good. The "mysterious" goings-on are great. I thoroughly enjoyed this movie, but there were two major flaws: (1) there was no background to anyone. I'm talking Predator-like characters- name, rank and serial number. What you did before this moment didn't really matter. And while that can work in action movies like Predator, it left me feeling like something was missing here; and (2) TJ Miller was in it. Look, if I'd known TJ Miller was in it, I wouldn't have rented the movie. If you don't know- go read up on what he's admitted to (and apologized for) doing to a woman... then go throw up... and then question why there are so many people in Hollywood that are dead set on giving him another shot. Hint: you don't get another shot, TJ Miller. You're a miscreant. You don't deserve positive public attention. That aside, I enjoyed the movie a lot on the merits of the movie. But it's hard for me to recommend a movie that decided to hire TJ Miller.

[Kyle]

Come to Daddy- Stop everything and listen to me: Elijah Wood is a fucking national treasure! I mean it, y'all. I love this guy so much. He's got all the money in the world from playing a Hobbit, and what does he decide to do with it? Make movies that he's passionate about. And in his case, that means horror movies where he plays a weirdo. And let's be clear, Wood plays a weirdo soooo well. What was the movie where he played the psycho with the mannequins? Maniac? Whatever. He was amazing. And he is in this too. He plays a recovering addict goth who's always lived off his mom's money and never made anything of himself. He wears a witch's hat, has the MOST bizarre haircut, and is engrossing as an awkward loser that wants so badly to be comfortable in his own skin, but clearly isn't. The movie starts with him getting off a bus and having to hike through the wilderness to find his dad's cabin. His dad left when he was five, and he hadn't heard from him until he got a letter asking him to come visit. When he get's there, his dad is a mean, cruel bastard and you have to wonder why he even asked his son to visit if he despises him (and everyone so much). The answer to that question is when the movie get's crazy. And I'm not going to spoil it because I fucking loved this movie. And I want you to see it for yourself. Hell, just watch it for Elijah Wood's performance, which is note-perfect and amazing. So good.

[Kyle]

We Summon The Darkness- I have to confess: I love modern horror movies set in the 80s. In reality, the 80s were as campy as horror movies are, so it's a perfect fit. This is a Satanic Cult horror movie where three young girls on their way to a heavy metal concert get mixed up with some skeevy dudes at the concert. They all go to an after party together and things go downhill. Even though it was predictable and jumped through the necessary hoops you would want from a movie like this- it was still a lot of fun. It knew it was campy and it walked that line pretty well. The problem is just that it was kind of uninspired. You know what's going to happen- then it happens. Sometimes you laugh and sometimes you don't. What elevates the movie is the actors playing the three ladies going to the concert. They're worthy of a better movie than this, and especially better than Johnny Knoxville phoning in a performance as a tv evangelist that rails against heavy metal music. Also disappointing was the lack of any real heavy metal music. How many needy bands are there that would license heavy metal music to this movie? Like- known bands, right? Hell, RATT is doing Geico commercials (which are brilliant). So I guess it was a mixed bag, but still guilty fun. I also want to point out that this movie stars Alexandria Daddario who is this generation's Kelly Kapowski. If you know what that means, you'll know I'm right.

[Kyle]

Becky- What did I just see? For real. It's a home invasion movie with Kevin James as a terrifying white supremacist that escapes from prison. He terrorizes Becky and her family- which consists of Becky's Dad (played by Joel McHale), Dad's fiance and her son. You see, Becky's 13 and her mom died a year before and even though Dad is "ready to move on," she's still angry with the world. And when a group of neo-nazi escapees invade their vacation home, she unleashes her fury on them. Y'all. Y'ALL! Does she ever! I really thought this movie was going to be a bust with Kevin James in it- but he is legitimately terrifying. But the draw is Lulu Wilson, playing Becky, who was actually 13 when she filmed this and is a fucking force of nature. Her story arc is so great and the interplay between her and James is so tense and scary. The one drawback here is Joel McHale. Look- when he's playing the sarcastic guy (basically himself, or imitating Will Arnett, I suppose) it's just not good. I'm concluding he's just not a good actor because you see him suppressing his true personality. But who cares. This movie was amazing despite him. Warning- it's gory. So if that's not your bag- watch it anyways!

[Kyle]

The Wretched- This is that timeworn classic story of a boy that moves in with his dad for the summer only to discover that his neighbor is possessed by a witch and killing kids. Wait, what? Yup. For half the movie, I joked it was "Rear Window" with a witch. Starring a bunch of people I don't recognize and having a weird plot structure that seems to meander a bit- this movie actually kept me involved enough to get to the real reason to watch it- the left turn it takes at the end. Normally I don't like saying that there's a twist in a movie, because you'll look for it and find it before the reveal, and that kind of ruins the fun. I don't have this problem here because this twist came straight out of the blue and I'm not worried about you spotting it (and no- they're not all dead the entire time). But the reveal is so satisfying and deserved. It was really cool. The acting is just okay and the dialogue is just okay. But this was a unique story that really pays off in the end. Recommended.

[Zombie]

[Kyle]

True Fiction- I'm putting this out there- I don't know why I liked this movie and i can't recommend it because I'm not sure anyone else will. It's about a young woman who is hired by a Stephen King-like horror writer to be his assistant. When she gets to the isolated cabin, he tells her he wants to test her limits of fear so that he can include her as the main character in his next book. The movie then engages in this psychodrama of "is this just an exercise in fear, or is this guy just a psycho?" There were some weird tone jumps that I didn't care for, and the scripting had some logical jumps that weren't great. The acting was good and the terror was real. But I kept going back and forth- maybe three or four times- about who to believe. So I kind of liked it. But I'm not sure anyone else will.

[Kyle]

Cruel Peter- I'm just going to get through this. That's what I kept telling myself as I watched this boring and utterly forgettable movie. It's about a widower and his deaf daughter who go to Italy to restore a historic cemetery. They discover "Cruel Peter's" hidden crypt- he was a mean rich kid that tortured peasants- but like in 1908? That was a weird disconnect for me. Anyway, there's more plot but I don't care. Terrible. Boring. Stupid. At the time that I'm placing this movie, I'm fitting it in between "The Turning" and "Brahams: The Boy 2." Honestly, these three movies are interchangeable with each other. It's creepy visuals that don't make much sense to the plot; dialogue and character motivations that are nonsensical; and an indecipherable plot. And boring. Which sucks because they had this cool thing called a "Bishop's Sphere" which was like a ouija board, but instead it was a globe with markings on it that you spun on an illuminated setting, and when it stopped sometimes it made words on the projections out of the markings on the sphere. I really dug that. But they ruined it. Just like they did cinema as a whole with this movie. Hard pass.

[FlameBlade]

2020 This movie is unique in the sense that it's a year long interactive performance. It combines the worst aspects of many contigon-related movies or tv series. It selected the nastiest non-zombie aspects of World War Z novel. Many viewers of this shipwreck of a script do not survive, and we cannot even look away because it's that bad. Pandemic, Fascism, and every rolled up in one. The script has yet to finish, and hoping that it might hit a high note soon, but I am pessimistic.

[Kyle]

The Rental- What a great cast! Alison Brie (Community, Horse Girl) and Dan Stevens (Legion). Directed by Dave Franco (the non-rapist Franco) and written by Dave Franco and Joe Swanberg! How can this go wrong! So let me tell you how. Characters making stupid decisions that make no sense. That's how. SPOILER ALERT: this is a Dead-Hooker-in-the-Bathtub movie (ala Very Bad Things) and it just doesn't make sense. At every turn in this movie, you are looking at the characters and yelling at the screen: CALL THE COPS! Their decisions are just dumb and clearly were made just to create more plot points. It felt like a betrayal because the characters were actually pretty three-dimensional before the Very Bad Things happened. And what a waste of talent. There was a lot to like about this movie, but it was ruined by nonsensical character motivations. And for what it's worth- in a stupid movie with no character development, bad character decisions are okay and sometimes even funny. But when you've spent so much time developing these complicated characters with intricate relationships, you can't destroy that with contrived motivations. Very disappointing.

[Kyle]

Beneath Us- What a great fucking little indie horror movie! And an awesome premise: four undocumented day laborers are picked up to finish out a guest house for a rich couple. Things go bad. Real bad. You hardly see horror movies today from a latinx point of view. The few that are out there have been pretty good (there was a Paranormal Activity that I really liked), but they are so few and far between. This movie builds rich characters with real complicated needs, and then... well, it tortures them. And the whole thing is wrought over with the themes of racial and class inequality. And it's done with a heavy hand, but not a smothering one. The tone is just right. I really enjoyed this movie that made a lot out of a very small budget.

[Kyle]

The Other Lamb- I don't know how this movie got categorized as a horror movie. It's not. Not in any way. It's an indie drama about a fundamentalist religious cult that is very suppressive to women and tells the coming of age story of one of the girls in the cult. I didn't really enjoy the movie because I kept wondering when the horror elements were going to appear, only to realize two thirds of the way through that I'd been duped. All the same, even if I knew what I was getting into, I still wouldn't have liked it. Even though it had superb acting, the story was just so understated and slow. There was probably only ten minutes of dialogue in the whole movie, the rest was shots of people looking wrought and angst-ridden. It's a shame because the cinematography and lush setting were beautifully shot. It was just so boring and slow.

[Kyle]

The Relic- While this was definitely a horror film, it wasn't a typical "scary" film. It's horror is derived more from the subject matter, although there are outright, batshit-insane moments of horror. The story centers on three generations of women. The mom (played by Emily Mortimer) who has to take a leave of absence from her job to care for her mom, who suffers from dementia. She brings her adult daughter with her to help, with the intent of finding an assistive living facility to care for her. Once they all arrive, the grandmom gets weird and the mom and daughter start to experience weird stuff. The end has this beautiful arc to it that I really liked, but I can see that this movie will be divisive and people will hate it. The acting in the movie is freaking phenomenal by all three of the main characters, and the plot moves at a steady slow-burn pace. While I enjoyed it, the movie is HIGHLY metaphorical with the horror stemming from the loss of your mind and memories through dementia. I can understand how that would put some people off. But if you're in to art-house movies, then this might be a good fit for you.

[Zombie]

I was waiting for you to watch The Relic. We liked it but you are absolutely right that some will hate it.