Tahlvin Will Probably Kill This Unkillable Thread

[Mike]

I'm choosing not to post here so that Eliahad can win the thread.

[Stan]

Aww that's so sweet. Eliahad deserves a win.

[Tahlvin]

She's like the wind through my tree
She rides the night next to me
She leads me through moonlight
Only to burn me with the sun
She's taken my heart
But she doesn't know what she's done

[Kyle]

That’s my wife. You’re a real jerk, Tahlvin.

[Eliahad]

Tahlvin may have taken your wife, Kyle, but Stan will always have your heart.

[Kyle]

Damn. That's true.

[Stan]

I keep it in a hidden location. For "insurance."

[Phoebe]

First he's posting songs about how he's a creep and now he's posting about how he has secured someone's organs as insurance. Hm. Hmmm.

[Tahlvin]

Another sleepless night I can't explain
Somebody said they heard me call your name
The radio won't let you leave my mind
I know it's over but I don't know why

[Kyle]

Because you stole my wife, Tahlvin. I’m pretty sure you knew that. Tahlvin.

[Mike]

Aaayyyyyy!

[Kyle]

You jumped the shark.

[Mike]

BEE!!!

[Tahlvin]

Fortunately you have got
Someone who relies on you
We started out as friends
But the thought of you just caves me in
The symptoms are so deep
It is so much too late to turn away
We started out as friends

[Phoebe]

Good morning! Grey traces of dawn tinge the eastern sky. Out of the shadowy trees I have spied three travelers! They must have come across the river.
I feel sad for some reason, just seeing them walking down there. But it's silent except for the birds announcing the dawn.
Ugh, from my tower I can still see those guys walking - what are they doing over here?
Well okay, I went down and told them they could stay in the basement if they were lost, and they agreed.
Then some jerk showed up and tried to assault me! What kind of name is By-Tor?

[Mike]

See?

[Eliahad]

Dee...bee, see? C D B?

[Kyle]

We’re not friends until you stop living with my wife. Tahlvin.

[Tahlvin]

How can it be permissible
She compromised my principle, yeah yeah
That kind of love is mythical
She's anything but typical
She's a craze you'd endorse, she's a powerful force
You're obliged to conform when there's no other course
She used to look good to me, but now I find her

[Kyle]

Way to rub it in, Tahlvin.