Good Feminist

[Phoebe]

That's all I have to say about this publicly. This stuff never ceases to amaze me.

[Phoebe]

This advice may be unwelcome or TMI, but if you're a woke dude whose women lack the miracle of modern life that is OB brand tampons, you could probably earn yourself some lasting credit by acquiring a box of these genius creations. This is not a new opinion on my part; I only express it with urgency today because it is becoming relatively difficult to find this brand of tampon.

Here is the possibly unwelcome/TMI part, skip as needed:
The most typical brand of tampons is Tampax, which are constructed as a roll, to be inserted into the body at the end of an application tube. It is becoming more difficult to find the cardboard applicator, assuming they still even make such a thing, so you're also using extra plastics. The plastic ones have a ring of little plastic triangular teeth at the end, and thus you also get to stab yourself in the vagina every time with a little ring of plastic teeth. This may be a feature for some but it is not a feature for me.

Once they become saturated, they start to unroll into their original shape of lumpy rectangle. This means you either need to change them too frequently, or experience the joys of extracting that lumpy rectangle, which is powerless against an actual "flow" of anything. Vaginas are not flat rectangles, much as they may seem that way in written diagrams.

The OB tampon, by contrast, is a rounded cylinder which expands equally in all directions from the center. Much like a wine cork. It actually works. It does not have any type of plastic applicator that stabs you with its little teeth because you just stick it in there with your finger. Thank you, PSA end.

[Phoebe]

Makeup:
I'm now in a position to report empirical evidence with an n of four. The young ladies of today find that makeup which is too subdued and natural is in fact more damaging to self-esteem and less feminist, because the goal of such makeup is to enhance beauty without anyone knowing that you have enhanced it. The implication is that you require enhancements, I'm more over that they must remain secret because you're supposed to have popped out into the world naturally looking like this.

Meanwhile, the goal of makeup that you choose because you like the colors or think it looks cool is for you to enjoy something and take command of the drag in which we all must present ourselves in the world daily (drag theory courtesy of RuPaul - anything beyond our naked birth form is drag). Thus it is empowering because you get to play and have fun and enjoy your appearance, and it doesn't matter whether you've particularly enhanced its beauty or not, because that wasn't your goal.

This scientific report is biased by the total and violent agreement of the reporter.

[Phoebe]

Oh dear, now those of us who are mildly suspicious of the evolving sexual assault allegation against Biden are being told we are not feminists if we have any doubts. But this is not a bad feminist situation, sorry. I'm open to believing! I would have remained open to believing, except that the following is the thought process of the person whose other claims we would have to accept uncritically (quoted from last year's published article that was, um, deleted by the author upon its recent and inconvenient rediscovery):

"President Putin’s genius is his judo ability to conserve his own energy and let the opponents flail, using up their energy, while he gains position. Currently, President Putin has a higher approval rating in America then the American President, particularly with women. President Putin has an alluring combination of strength with gentleness. His sensuous image projects his love for life, the embodiment of grace while facing adversity. It is evident that he loves his country, his people and his job. Although his job may seem like in the words of writer, Elizabeth Gilbert on genius, “ trying to swallow the sun.” This is a whole lot to deal with for one mere mortal… President Putin’s obvious reverence for women, children and animals, and his ability with sports is intoxicating to American women."

I say this as an allegedly intoxicated American woman who fully against every wish of her conscious will was forced by her brain to have a romantical dream about Steve Bannon: The person who wrote the above is not someone I'm inclined to trust on ANY factual matters, like what day of the week it is. Sorry, that doesn't make me a bad feminist; it makes me capable of basic critical thought.