How racist are you?

[Kyle]

I'm going to guess that everyone is going to say that they're not racist. But come on.

Come on.

I don't believe anyone doesn't harbor just a little bias or racism in their heart. Even the Dalai Lama is like, "Burnt tofu again? That's what I get for agreeing to a Bavarian chef!" (Note: I don't know if the Dalai Lama eats tofu or that Bavarians are known for being bad chefs- I guess that's the extent of my racism.)

So how racist are you? I'd give myself a 2 on a scale of 1-10- maybe a 3. I don't knowingly act on biases, but I know that I've felt uncomfortable in situations where there was no justification for it other than I was just the outsider to the group.

[Bonefish]

Not too racist. Can't be racist against imaginary races, after all.

Edit: I'd say somewhee around a 2-3. I occasionally say some shit I shouldn't say in private company, but generally speaking, I don't think I'm racist.

unless we're considering "white" to be a race, in which case: fuck those guys.

[Mike]

I'd put myself at about a 3, but I personally know some VERY racist people (a 7ish on my scale) who insist they aren't racist. They'd probably give themselves a 2 or 3 on a 10 point scale.

So do I compare myself to them and give myself a 1 or 2? OR do I assume that all people grossly underestimate their own racism and round myself up to 5 just to be on the safe side?

[Walrus]

I am a misanthrope. So I guess you could say I nurture all racisms equally? I've been quoted as saying
"I'm not racist, I hate all you barstards equally!" but the opposite could be true.

But then, being that my most detested species is Homo sapiens sapiens I might be speciesist ...

[Phoebe]

I am somewhat racist against Germans. I try to let reason take control of that. I grew up in a culture where I think racist views were the norm, so I think it's something you have to do a lot of work on.

This post has been edited to insert the SARCASM HAND. Because the experiences I have had lately would blow your mind and lead me to insert the SARCASM HAND.

[bralbovsky]

Really Bad experience with an East Indian suitemate, took me years to recover.
Blessedly, I have lived and worked in very diverse circumstances with mostly terrific people.
Do I blissfully lead friends and family into situations that make them uncomfortable? Yup. Kids are over it.

In some defense of the "don't see" people. I think they merely misstate it. We assign values to everything. If the values are dramatically shifted because of racial cues (which I substitute as a more accurate noun than "race") music, attire, complexion, accent, etc, that's bias or prejudice. I believe it is entirely possible to be more or less value neutral regarding those cues. I have known plenty of people of all stripes who wade effortlessly and fairly through what might be considered 'racially charged" circumstances.

Having said that, there are absolutely things that trigger my "this guy is probably a moron" response with very minimal data. I'm keeping that list to myself because it includes certain music choices and other irrational metrics.

Additionally, I fundamentally have no authority over anything, so tilting the scales against someone, for any reason, is not often a thing, and really, racism requires at least some power.

[Phoebe]

[mimekiller]

If anyone wants to atone for any racism they can do so in my GF legal gofundme

Help Niki get her children back https://www.gofundme.com/help-niki-get- ... cbbc4b444a

[Iantha]

Absolutely I'm racist, but it's something I'm working on. Being in W Michigan and being surrounded by Trump supporters, DeVos types, and a VERY strong missionary culture has really tainted my view of white people. I'd say I'm a 4. I have to actively remind myself that "not all white people". It's an interesting situation because I'm only a little melenated and I married someone who is incredibly undermelenated. But I think it's less about the melanin and more about the conservative/religious factor and the mistreatment of immigrants for me. I'm from a family of immigrants, raised by another family of immigrants, and learned English as a second language. The religious right has treated melanated and non English-speakers I love with extreme distaste, I've witnessed it systematically and repeatedly over the years, and I'm pretty over it. If I see someone who has a promise ring, a little cross around their neck, or hear any talk about mission trips or Young Life I'm ready to completely write them off.

So... does that make me a racist, or does that make me biased and prejudiced against religious conservatism?

[Phoebe]

Sounds like the latter to me. For many years I practiced tolerance of people who had extremely conservative Christian views, because so many of my family members are like this, and it was hard for me to take it personally if that meant damaging the relationships. Now that I have kids, or maybe since I have made more trips around the sun, or our politics went even further downhill, I find myself less able to tolerate it in people. I have a hard time going to church sometimes, even though the people at my church surely are not the offenders we are troubled about. My oldest two kids do not believe in God and I feel a complete reluctance to encourage them interacting with a Church community, because I know they're going to get so much pressure to normalize that stuff anyway. For instance, it horrifies me that we have to act like it's normal when people support a church that actually pays for and delivers conversion therapy. Yet I am surrounded by so many people who are fine with this. The Catholic Church is responsible for untold suffering of actual people I know in my city, in everything from control of women's reproductive lives to persecuting gay people to excusing and tolerating horrible child abuse, yet a whole quarter of my family is Catholic and a huge number of other acquaintances are as well. The older I get, the less I can just get over it. People give their money to support this still. I get that we can't have total purity in the institutions we wish to support that do other good, but we have so many choices about how to spend our time and treasure and people keep choosing to support these organizations that inflict suffering and do not make recompense for their harms. I don't get it. I'm probably going to end up living alone, friendless, in a nursing home surrounded by Missouri Synod Lutherans who are sure I'm going to hell.

[Iantha]

[Phoebe]

Yep. I can understand why I did this when I was younger, because there were a lot of problems larger than myself to address. It's one thing to protest when people say rude things, or tell them you disagree, but it's another to really make that "done with you until you're decent again" move. Now that we have committed to doing the latter, it is really difficult. We are the only ones in the family who will do it and thus everyone blames us for the inconvenience. It is annoying but we finally were at a place like, we are simply not beholden to people, and in fact they should be beholden to us, or better yet, to their own damn principles of decent behavior. Relations are frosty at the moment, especially with the liberal people who think we should let it all go, since that's what they are doing, and our choice honestly makes them feel guilty. I'm sorry, but there it is. On a purely pragmatic, selfish level, I also realized it is easier on some level. Emotionally hard but most people are takers, and that's how it goes.

[Phoebe]

I was thinking about this and here's an observation: on the one hand, people are upset with us for making it difficult to plan family events. They either have to make the choice to exclude us or they have to come up with some other plan. We're not going to change the mind of people who are entrenched racists. On the other hand, I think it's useful for people to be able to explain this and lean on us that way. Like, nobody wants to be around these racists and we finally gave them the excuse they needed to take action, which is probably secretly some sort of relief, and isn't the point that tipping the scales is needed? While we are not going to change the minds of certain people, I think we are definitely giving pause to those who were in the middle, and by the middle sadly I mean Republicans who don't like to consider themselves racists. They tell people that all of this is our fault, but I think they know better and it has caused them to moderate some of their language and behaviors in other respects. So in the overall analysis I think better results are achieved; it is not merely that we're acting this way on principle without getting any positive effect out of it.

[mimekiller]

so the chicas youngest child(5) does this thing where she has this belt thing that she ties to her shoe and hands it to me and dances around and goes "i'm your pet monkey I'm your pet monkey" My luck she will do this in public and I will be seen as a vile racist that taught a poor black child this game!