This Happened

[Phoebe]

Wow, congrats! That is a huge deal!

[Phoebe]

I can't easily deal with the racism of the people in my local area. This was a particularly bad day for it. I also feel like shit because it was one of those situations: someone really should give these people what for, but there is no chance they will even grasp how absolutely offensive and embarrassing they are. The people on the left of me were bitching about how "libruls" are supposed to be pro-justice and instead are totally hateful and immoral people. These people deserve a hearty Fuck You, but I'm not the right person to give it, and my bleating on about how their remarks aren't very charitable to others and they should be more open-minded, especially when kids can hear them? That will go over like a lead balloon, so... Meanwhile, assholes to the right sat and made racist comments, which I can't even get into here. If my husband was there it would have been a show worth watching because he IS the right guy to say something to cut these scumbags down to their proper mental size. For me it was a phone call and email to the event organizers afterward, which I hope does more long-term good than anything I could have accomplished face to face. The point is, I'm sick of living among racists and I know it's everywhere, and moving to another place is not a realistic option or a solution to this, but what the fuck people? What is wrong with these people? They are the biggest whining, entitled assholes, and the only joy one takes later is in their being too stupid to actually compete in arenas where it counts the most.

Also, please file this to White people really are intensely racist in the "real" way, all the damn time, and we need to stop pretending as a nation that white people are not racist in this true, in-their-hearts way.

[Phoebe]

Sick, sick again, sick like a dog but must
Do Stuff Regardless. Giving up on ... all.
The sad ox is ground slowly into dust
No end to things that grow one's cortisol.

[mimekiller]

Bumped into a chica who ghosted me and she apologized for it and gave me her lunch leftovers as what I can only assume is a consolation prize of sorts.

[Phoebe]

I feel you, scraps of lunch actually sounds like a great tradeoff in comparison. Probably better than anything else you would have been given by a person like that. Fuck these people. We could go drink scotch but you don't live here, and you are mean to my friend. So... Enjoy the part lunch! Peace.

[mimekiller]

As my grandpa used to say to my cowering grandmother with the smell of cheap whiskey on his breath....I only hit because i Love.

[Phoebe]

I do not understand your ways. However, I have been suffering this horrid, stabbing pain all week so I'm basically delirious and don't care. I'm just laying here crying, basically, until the ibuprofen takes the edge.

[Phoebe]

It hurts so bad and it just will not stop and I don't know what to do. I went to the doctor and they must be wrong about what's going on. Aaaaaaaaagh.

[Zen]

[Phoebe]

There's something horribly wrong from the neck up. So basically, what's new? Luckily now past the laying there crying stage, which lasted about 8 days straight, and have developed a high fever instead. So either that's good news and this is going to break through to the other side of an infection or whatever, or you won't be hearing from me.

[Phoebe]

Today was such a good day relative to the rest of the week that preceded it, and now it's just all gone bad again. Regular painkiller does nothing but I don't want to take a narcotic type pain killer. So there it is. Can't drink alcohol with any of this. I've got to get up and function at high speed for the next 2 days and don't see how it's going to happen. I don't know if I got an injury while I was at the dentist last week and it got infected, or if it was an accidentally self-inflicted injury to the head that got infected, or if it's some kind of meningitis or infected jawbone or mastoid bone - the pain is so diffuse now I don't even know where it's coming from. Maybe a whole garter snake loose in the skull? Aaaaaaaaagh

[Ronster]

Update? How are you making it today?

[Phoebe]

I'm making it quickly and with a knife sticking out the side of my head for some reason. I went to the doctor and they don't really know what's up. Could go to another one or maybe a specialist but I don't have time for that! I swear preventive health care would be radically transformed in this country, probably to the tune of enormous savings, if people actually had time to go to the doctor when they needed to. Ugh.

[Phoebe]

Something is in the water this week because a bad thing has happened, twice! Two bad things! I am trying to stay focused on the fact that everyone is (aside from long-term illnesses we already knew about) healthy and happy and functioning, so the bad things can proceed and we will deal with them, but ugh. Bad things. It's kind of like a parallel to what is going on in the country. We had problems already, we knew that, and then a bunch of bad shit fell upon us and continues to befall us daily, and democracy is going to have to trudge on and preserve its health and happiness regardless. I am really worried about what is going to happen, however, due to the bad things that have happened and now... now what?


Also, theories: where the myelin sheath hath been damaged, cannot beneficial improvements nevertheless be made? Is it not worth trying?

[Tahlvin]

My oldest son got a job! He'll be working at the same software company I worked at for 10-1/2 years. He starts at the beginning of June.

[Phoebe]

Congratulations! That's great news!

I'm hanging out here discovering confirmation that the reason Chloe has miraculously never had "drama" of the usual late grade school kind is: she is the Alpha Dog of the social system, and apparently controls the boundaries of her Alpha Clique. How the heck? And how strange for me to invite the other girls' parents to come over this summer only to realize... Puzzlement on their faces. Trust y'all, I am not part of it.

[Zen]

[Tahlvin]

[Phoebe]

"Tahlvin who? Oh yeah that guy. I've been to a few holiday functions at his house. He's some type of distant relative... Second cousin maybe?"

[Zen]