"Nerrrrrrd"

[Eliahad]

I'm on a walk, and don't have more than a phone to jot things down, but I wanted to have the discussion.

The use of "Nerrrrrrd." It's been a derogatory term forever toward, well, people like us. I understand that Nerds are starting to, and now actually do, own the word. So why then, do we say it with all the extra 'r's'? Are we really just insecure about being a Nerd still? I don't know why, but something about "Nerrrrrrd" bugs me, where as just "Nerd" does not.

[Mike]

The extra r's make it an immitation of a specific movie line in which it was absolutely intended as derogatory. Nerrrrrds is a callback to bullying, for whatever that's worth. I use it myself, both with and without the extra r's as an ironic punchline.

Here's the kicker though--until you brought it up here, I did not recognize that my gut reaction to having it brandished at ME in that way is instinctive defensiveness. Just a twinge, and not enough to keep me from appreciating the humor in it, but it never occurred to me that others might be having a similar, but stronger, reaction.

That is interesting.

[mimekiller]

Mostly just used in my clan as a joke regarding a current pro wrestler that looks like that guy so we shout it out when he makes a appearance in our wrassling shows.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F-rTbw2uZNA

[FlameBlade]

Mike called some group nerds. I honestly read that as nerrrrrrrrds.

Mike, own up.

Besides, we all know that I'm the Nerrrrrrrrrrrr...rrrrd.

[Eliahad]

[Mike]

I'm with you. You've convinced me.

The way I use it is to bring a moment down a notch. Instead of reveling in someone's (or my own) nerdity, I use nerrrrrrd to bring it down a peg as if embarrassed by it or acknowledging how uncool it is--like Dr. Strange cheapening its moments of real passion and revelation by punctuating them with a slapstick cloak-fight. And that is NOT what I want to be about.

Calling it out is basically saying: I know there is something to be embarrassed about here, but I am not embarrassed! Compare that to Gal Gadot's Wonder Woman. She never had to say: I know that women aren't supposed to act this way, but I will do it anyway! Because she just did what she did. She didn't have to even acknowledge oppression, because it simply didn't apply to her.

I should be more like Wonder Woman.

[Phoebe]

"Does the word nerd have any connotation for you?" I asked Ron. "Positive? Negative?"

"Huh?"

"Were you ever called a nerd?"

"No. I used to call Peter a nerd."

"What? You mean like in a bad way? So it's a negative word?"

"Well, I don't know! Nobody ever called me that because I'm not a nerd."

Ron turns back to playing the Star Trek game app on his phone while watching Silicon Valley on Netflix.

"OK Jim, how about you? What does nerd mean?"

"Someone is the boss of the person."

"Uhh... You mean like nerds are bosses? BossY?"

"No, someone is the boss of them."

"Oh. But what if the nerd IS a boss, like dad or me?"

"Then the people they're the boss of are nerds."

"OK"

"Buffy, what's a nerd?"

"Get out of my room! Blgughgugjhh!"

For social science.

[Mike]

[Phoebe]

I just can't imagine why anybody would fix that label on someone whose obsessions range freely across science fiction in all genres, military history in the form of 1000 page tomes and bone-dry documentaries, role-playing games, video games, and Scrabble.

[Phoebe]

Conversation in car while driving Chloe home:
"So, what does the word 'nerd' mean to you?"

"It's a bad thing."

"What? Why's that?"

"Because nerds are people who get bullied. It's a thing you would call someone if you were going to be mean to them."

"But what if I like being a nerd? What if my friends and I think it's cool to have a lot of interests and be really smart and not be ashamed of that?"

"Older people maybe think it's like that, but it's not that way now with younger people."

"Okay, but if I decide I want it to be a good word, why can't I have it be that way? Like, nerds are good! Where my nerds at? I like nerds! I wou..."

"No Mom, it really doesn't mean that."

"Okay, it bothers me if the word means something about being bullied."

"Yeah."

"So what can I call it when someone has, well, nerdy interests? What if I'm really interested in math and science and space and history and ideas and I like to imagine stories about things like that?"

"That's just called being intelligent."

"OK, close enough."

Note: we had further discussion of this issue but that's the salient point for now.