Melania

[Elle]

Looking for silver linings, I find... Melania! Immigrant (legal or illegal? I'm not sure I ever quite followed all that) from Slovenia, now our First Lady. This is clearly an unpopular opinion among the dour feminists of the world, but I love it! She's terrific. In that one famous, formal photograph her child is literally riding a giant stuffed lion while she does some kind of leg-kick pose in a giant pink cape! True, she is a different kind of role model than Michelle Obama was for me, but still, this is a role model I can understand and appreciate! I want to pose in a cape; my son has a giant stuffed lion (too mushy to ride, but still!).

And here are four major considerations that, if you weren't already convinced to love her, should do the job:
First, she is a model who was unafraid to pose naked, and her husband is in no way ashamed of her naked photographs. Just like that, in a glorious instant, a bunch of conservative rules about what's okay and not okay for women and their bodies have VANISHED! We never have to hear that bullshit again! Next time someone goes down that whole "wasn't she asking for it by showing up in that state of undress?" avenue, just slap Melania Trump's photo down on the table and proclaim triumphantly, "The First Lady!"

Second, the plagiarism wasn't her fault, and if it was her fault, it's because she was trying to imitate the awesome Michelle Obama. Seriously now, that's what her speechwriters are for. They had the job to come up with those words - don't tell me Melania wrote that whole speech. The world is full of Republicans whose job it is to carefully examine things like First Lady speeches, and if they didn't listen to Michelle's speeches before writing Melania's, that's on the speechwriters. So: no blame to her for that one, please.

Third, her son is adorable! Have you seen that kid? He's adorable and she seems completely devoted to being a good mother to him. I respect that. He's also the right age for a son-in-law, you never know.

Fourth, after the whole "grab 'em by the pussy" thing came out, she wore a shirt with a necktie universally known as "a pussy bow" to the debates. It's not a widespread, current fashion - it's a throwback to the 80s, and I refuse to believe it wasn't done on purpose. Did her stylist choose it? Maybe, but I say even if s/he did, it's only plausible deniability for Melania. She's a professional model, remember? She knows fashion. That's her job in life in a very real sense. She knows exactly what a pussy bow is and why that was a thing at that moment. And if you aren't yet convinced this was deliberate and an A+++ case of trolling by a master, she did it again for the next debate!!!

[Cazmonster]

She eats babies - just look at her!

[Phoebe]

I like her, though I have naturally wrinkle free skin so don't need to pursue any extremes. I probably should have some Halloween candy so I don't thin out in the face parts.

[Mike]

I honestly have nothing against Melania. As stated above, the things that people might try to hold against her are not things that I feel you can right blame her for and/or that even deserve blame. Nude modeling? So what? That shouldn't be shameful. Plagiarism? Yeah, honestly that's on the writers. Illegal alien? Yeah, she was, but I don't blame her for any of that either, any more than I blame any person who comes to this country trying to make a better life for themselves. I don't know enough to judge her as a person, so I won't. She's a beautiful model who married a very rich older man. That's all I know.

What I can't stomach is people trying to make this a Battle of the First Ladies. I honestly just saw an image of Melania with the caption: "Melania will finally bring class back to the White House... Like and Share if you agree!" Fuck you. Hate on Obama for his policies and actions if you wish, but Michelle Obama has never been anything less than a perfect first lady. That woman has been the epitome of class for her eight years in the White House. I have nothing against Melania, and for her sake, I hope she can carry herself with that same level of dignity during her tenure in spite of her clown of a husband.

[Phoebe]

To be fair, the reply meme is Melania's naked picture with the same caption. Liberals who use that against her are not only being assholes, but are blind to the amazing possibilities now open. All that purity promise ring modesty bullshit is DEAD, I say! Victory to the forces of gentle kind goodness!!! And I am as modest as a Mennonite myself, same for my kids, so you know, I have nothing against that.

Michelle is the Queen and my role model in life, so... Did you happen to see the little troll in WVA who got fired for insulting her? Sweet justice.

[Mike]

[Phoebe]

Sure, she didn't get fired for insulting her per se, but for her choice of method. People are like waaah, free speech! She still has it. Imagine that. Now she can say it all day long. People are all sad about alt-right accounts "censored" by Twitter. Oh noes, the free speech lost! Astoundingly it remains, being the tenacious little sucker it is. Love it when anti-government, anti-entitlement "Thinkers" feel their special demands must be met by the owners of private companies who are in fact giving the public free access to their services without discrimination.