Nerd Pride Radio

I'm going to do a movie quote tournament, seeking to crown the best movie quote. Post your nominations here.

Rules for Nominations:

1. You can only post a single movie quote at a time.

2. You must wait until two other movie quotes have been nominated before you can nominate another movie quote.

3. Your nomination must be in the form of [MOVIE TITLE]: "[MOVIE QUOTE]" [MOVIE CHARACTER THAT SAYS THE QUOTE]

4. Your movie quote must be one single sentence. Thus, you cannot nominate "My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die." Rather, you can only nominate one of those sentences.

5. As the organizer of the tournament, I will not nominate any quotes. However, I reserve the right to disallow nominations that I think are garbage quotes. For example, if someone nominates-- Tangled: "Let's just assume for the moment that everyone in here doesn't like me!" Flynn Rider-- I will disqualify this as something that is clearly not up to the standards we're looking for here. If you're worried that I'll disqualify yours- don't. I'm only going to disqualify two things: (1) quotes that stand no chance and that I think were nominated as a troll; and (2) quotes from obscure movies that no one has seen but you. Specifically to point number 2- as an example, Zen loves anime and I'm sure there's epic quotes in things that are killer, but no one has seen but like him and a couple people on this board. I can think of great quotes for obscure horror movies. But both of those are generally unknown, so I'll probably disqualify them. The movie the quote comes from should be generally recognizable to most people, even if the quote itself is not.

6. We're looking for the "best" quotes. Bring to that whatever you want. That can mean: most badass; most iconic; funniest; memorable. Whatever.

I will update this post with qualifying nominations as they are made. I intend to cap it at 32 quotes, but depending on the level of interest, I might be convinced to go to 64. After the nominations are closed, I will randomize them into a 32-team, single elimination tournament. Then I will open a thread to vote on each match with a poll. The details of that, and how many matches I put up a day, will be worked out later.

NOMINATIONS:
1. Poltergiest (1982)- "They're here." Carol Ann Freeling (poorpete)
2. Lawrence of Arabia- "The trick, William Potter, is not minding that it hurts." T.E. Lawrence (akiva)
3. Star Wars- "I find your lack of faith disturbing." Darth Vader (Mike)
4. Unforgiven- "Deserve's got nothin' to do with it." William Munny (buckett)
5. The Graduate- "Plastics." Mr. McGuire (Eliahad)
6. Die Hard- "Yippie-ki-ay, motherfucker." John McClane (Mike)
7. The Godfather- "I'm gonna make him an offer he can't refuse." Don Vito Corleone (buckett)
8. Matrix: Reloaded- "Upgrades." Neo (Eliahad)
9. Memento- "We all lie to ourselves to be happy." Leonard Shelby (akiva)
10. Taxi Driver- "You talkin' to me?" - Travis Bickle (Phoebe)
11. Blazing Saddles- "I must have killed more men than Cecil B DeMille." The Waco Kid (poorpete)
12. Fargo- "And I guess that's your accomplice in the woodchipper chipper." Marge Gunderson (Eliahad)
13. Blazing Saddles- "Excuse me while I whip this out." Bart (Mike)
14. Blazing Saddles- "Mongo only pawn in game of life." Mongo (poorpete)
15. The Empire Strikes Back- "No, I am your father." Darth Vader (Phoebe)
16. The Sandlot- "You're killing me, Smalls." Ham Porter (Mike)
17. Wizard of Oz- "Toto, I've a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore." Dorothy (poorpete)
18. Hell or High Water- "He wouldn't know God if he crawled up his pant leg and bit him on the pecker." Texas Ranger Marcus Hamilton (buckett)
19. 300- "Spartans, ready your breakfast and eat hearty... for tonight, we dine in hell!" King Leonidas (Mike)
20. Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb- "I can no longer sit back and allow Communist infiltration, Communist indoctrination, Communist subversion and the international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids." Gen. Jack D. Ripper (Phoebe)
21. Life of Brian- "All right, but apart from the sanitation, medicine, education, wine, public order, irrigation, roads, the fresh water system and public health, what have the Romans ever done for us?" Reg (akiva)
22. Toy Story- "To infinity...and beyond!" Buzz Lightyear (Eliahad)
23. John Wick- "Yeah, well, because he stole John Wick's car, sir, and, uh, killed his dog." Aurelio (Zombie)
24. The Incredibles- "Throw me." Elastigirl (poorpete)
25. Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers- "Toss me." Gimli (Eliahad)
26. Back to the Future- "ONE POINT TWENTY ONE JIGAWATTS!" Doc Brown (Mike)
27. Furious 7- "The thing about street fights... the street always wins." Dominic Toretto (Zombie)
28. Wayne's World- "If you have to spew, spew into this." Garth Algar (poorpete)
29. Ghostbusters- "Let's show this prehistoric bitch how we do things downtown." Dr. Peter Venkman (Mike)
30. The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly: "You see, in this world there's two kinds of people, my friend: those with loaded guns, and those who dig." Blondie (buckett)
31. No Country For Old Men- "What's the most you ever lost on a coin toss?" Anton Chigurh (Zombie)
32. Apocalypse Now- "I love the smell of napalm in the morning." Lt. Col. Bill Kilgore (Mike)
33. Air Bud- "Ain't no rule says a dog can't play basketball." - Fat Referee (buckett)
34. Blazing Saddles- "My name is Jim, but most people call me Jim" - Jim (poorpete)
35. Cool Hand Luke- "What we've got here is failure to communicate." Captain (Phoebe)
36. Better Off Dead- "I want my two dollars!" Paperboy (Mike)
37. Jaws- "You're gonna need a bigger boat." Brody (Zombie)
38. The Apartment- "That's the way it crumbles, cookie-wise." CC Baxter (poorpete)
39. Silence of the Lambs- "It puts the lotion in the basket." Buffalo Bill (Mike)
40. King Kong- "It was beauty killed the beast." Carl Denham (Zombie)
41. Casablanca- "I'm no good at being noble, but it doesn't take much to see that the problems of three little people don't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world." Rick (poorpete)
42. Casablanca- "I'm shocked, shocked to find that gambling is going on in here!" Captain Renault (akiva)
43. From Dusk Till Dawn- "Don't you ever try and fucking run on us, cause I've got six little friends and they can all run faster than you can." Seth Gecko (buckett)
44. The Usual Suspects- "The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he did not exist." Verbal Kint (Zombie)
45. History of the World, Part I- "It's good to be the king!" King Louis XVI (Mike)
46. Scarface- "All I have in this world is my balls and my word, and I don't break em for no one." Tony Montana (buckett)
47. Fight Club- "Now, a question of etiquette - as I pass, do I give you the ass or the crotch?" Tyler Durden (Zombie)
48. American Pie- "And this one time, at band camp..." Michelle Flaharty (MIke)
49. They Live- "I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass...and I'm all out of bubblegum." John Nada (buckett)
50. Goodfellas- "As far back as I can remember I always wanted to be a gangster." Henry Hill (Zombie)
51. Monty Python and the Holy Grail- "Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries" Taunting French Guard (poorpete)
52. Paris, Texas- "I'm not afraid of heights, I'm afraid of fallin'." Travis Henderson (buckett)
53. Pulp Fiction- "And now, little man, I give the watch to you." Captain Koons (Pheobe)
54. Star Wars: "May the Force be with you." Han Solo (Zombie)
55. Repo Man- "Ordinary fuckin' people, I hate 'em." Bud (buckett)
56. Super Troopers- "I swear to God, I'll pistol whip the next guy who says shenaningans!" Capt. O'Hage (Mike)
57. Midnight Cowboy- "I'm walkin' here!" Ratso Rizzo (akiva)
58. Real Genius- "A girl's gotta have her standards." Susan (Phoebe)
59. Pitch Black- "You got it all wrong, holy man: I absolutely believe in God, and I absolutely hate the fucker." Riddick (Mike)
60. There Will Be Blood- "I... drink... your... milkshake!" Daniel Plainview (Zombie)
61. Snow White- "Magic Mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?" the Evil Queen (Phoebe)
62. Scarface- "Say hello to my little friend!" Tony Montana (Mike)
63. The Sixth Sense- "I see dead people." Cole Sear (Kyle)
64. On the Waterfront- "I coulda been a contender." Terry (Phoebe)

Can they be lines from a movie that were sung?

Poltergiest: "They're here" - Carol Ann

I was just coming back to delete it because I couldn't remember who said it. Please strike it, thank you.

American Beauty "Janie, today I quit my job. And then I told my boss to go fuck himself. And then I blackmailed him for almost sixty thousand dollars. Pass the asparagus." Lester Burnham

Lawrence of Arabia: "The trick, William Potter, is not minding that it hurts." [T.E. Lawrence]

Dude. If you don't want to play, don't play.

I keed! I keed!

I just want something badass for my first quote, and all the ones I have listed can't be encapsulated in a single sentence.

"It's an .88 Magnum. It shoots through schools."
Jack Burtons speech on his CB.
Inigo Montoya.
Conan's "What is best in life?"
Fight Club's "breathing smoke" isn't as impressive without shooting a panda between the eyes.

I'm working on it.

Understood- without suggesting any particular quotes, Arnold Schwarzenegger has several good ones.

I originally was going to make this the Funniest Movie Quotes, because I recently heard someone talk about this line from Teen Wolf: "There are three rules that I live by: never get less than twelve hours sleep; never play cards with a guy who has the same first name as a city; and never get involved with a woman with a tattoo of a dagger on her body. Now you stick to that, and everything else is cream cheese." Coach Finstock. But then I realized this would lead to paragraphs that don't lend themselves to a tournament-style vote-off.

So then I was going to make it the tournament of One-Liners- but then it would just be bad puns from action movies. And I didn't want to rule out some choice quotes from movies directors like Scorsese or Coppola. So I compromised and decided to limit it to one sentence.

Note- while the first line of the Teen Wolf quote would qualify- what really sells the quote is the "cream cheese" comment in the second.

Star Wars "I find your lack of faith disturbing." Darth Vader

Not at all. That quote is iconic. However, now that I've found my spreadsheet-full-of-movie-quotes, I now have 30 one-liners that are easily on the same level. I just need the rest of you lazy bastards to get on the ball.

[Unforgiven]: "Deserve's got nothin' to do with it." - William Munny

The Graduate: "Plastics." - Mr. McGuire

Die Hard "Yippie-ki-ay, motherfucker." John McClane (Bruce Willis)

[The Godfather]: "I'm gonna make him an offer he can't refuse." - Don Vito Corleone

Matrix: Reloaded - "Upgrades." - Neo

Memento: "We all lie to ourselves to be happy."
[Leonard Shelby]