The 12 Hour Deathless Thread

Kyle · Post by **Kyle** » Thu Apr 21, 2022 3:50 pm

Is not this thread. This is not a deathless thread.

Post by **Mike** » Thu Apr 21, 2022 3:53 pm

Cutting it back to 12 hours didn't make it die faster, so now you need to sow confusion?

poorpete · Post by **poorpete** » Thu Apr 21, 2022 5:16 pm

Lock it down!

Eliahad · Post by **Eliahad** » Thu Apr 21, 2022 6:23 pm

Do we have to keep both of them going, now?

poorpete · Post by **poorpete** » Thu Apr 21, 2022 7:12 pm

Top 2 The 12 Hour Deathless Thread #2
The 12 Hour Deathless Thread (2022)

Kyle · Post by **Kyle** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 5:55 am

No. This is not a deathless thread. My ploy failed. This one should die.

poorpete · Post by **poorpete** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 6:26 am

Yes, and since we all definitely don't have a screw loose in the competitive part of our brain, it'll be easy for us to let this just fade out after this post.

Post by **Mike** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 6:46 am

But it SHALL pass. We've had decoy unkillable threads in the past. In every case, there is a movement to keep both threads alive. It will be a double challenge! HAHA!... and then the joke is old and it dies in a under a week.

Even knowing that, I make this meta-post in order to demoralize the rest of you in hopes that I can "win" this non-competitive thread, knowing full well it will just light a fire under a couple of you and then still die unceremoniously in a few days.

Eliahad · Post by **Eliahad** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 6:53 am

What is winning, anyway?

Post by **Mike** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 7:57 am

Eliahad wrote: ↑Fri Apr 22, 2022 6:53 am What is winning, anyway?

To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women.

Kyle · Post by **Kyle** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 9:06 am

Guys, this is not a deathless thread. It specifically says so in the first post. If no one posts for 12 hours, nothing happens and no one wins. It was a terrible ploy by me, a terrible person. Please stop posting here. It detracts from the real hero: Tahlvin, who deserves to win the real deathless thread. (Which again, is not this thread.)

Eliahad · Post by **Eliahad** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 9:11 am

Mike wrote: ↑Fri Apr 22, 2022 7:57 am
Eliahad wrote: ↑Fri Apr 22, 2022 6:53 am What is winning, anyway?
To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women.

That seems kind of sexist and colonialist. Are you sure we can't just call it a good game and get cookies and ice cream afterwards?

Post by **Mike** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 9:49 am

Kyle wrote: ↑Fri Apr 22, 2022 9:06 am Guys, this is not a deathless thread. It specifically says so in the first post. If no one posts for 12 hours, nothing happens and no one wins. It was a terrible ploy by me, a terrible person. Please stop posting here. It detracts from the real hero: Tahlvin, who deserves to win the real deathless thread. (Which again, is not this thread.)

You're even more transparent than I am somehow.

Kyle · Post by **Kyle** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 10:36 am

Mike wrote: ↑Fri Apr 22, 2022 9:49 am
Kyle wrote: ↑Fri Apr 22, 2022 9:06 am Guys, this is not a deathless thread. It specifically says so in the first post. If no one posts for 12 hours, nothing happens and no one wins. It was a terrible ploy by me, a terrible person. Please stop posting here. It detracts from the real hero: Tahlvin, who deserves to win the real deathless thread. (Which again, is not this thread.)
You're even more transparent than I am somehow.

STOP! I know you all think that this thread will go dead and then I will claim victory. That can't happen because this isn't a deathless thread. It was a dumb joke! I'm sorry! I regret my choices! Stop posting and let this thread die. PLEASE

Tahlvin · Post by **Tahlvin** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 10:53 am

C'mon, guys, stop posting so Kyle doesn't feel guilty for trying to cheat.

Post by **Mike** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 11:03 am

Kyle wrote: ↑Fri Apr 22, 2022 10:36 am
Mike wrote: ↑Fri Apr 22, 2022 9:49 am
Kyle wrote: ↑Fri Apr 22, 2022 9:06 am Guys, this is not a deathless thread. It specifically says so in the first post. If no one posts for 12 hours, nothing happens and no one wins. It was a terrible ploy by me, a terrible person. Please stop posting here. It detracts from the real hero: Tahlvin, who deserves to win the real deathless thread. (Which again, is not this thread.)
You're even more transparent than I am somehow.
STOP! I know you all think that this thread will go dead and then I will claim victory. That can't happen because this isn't a deathless thread. It was a dumb joke! I'm sorry! I regret my choices! Stop posting and let this thread die. PLEASE

Stages of trying to sway your friend who thinks he's funny:

1. Reason
2. C'mon guys, joke's over.
3. Attestations of seriousness.
4. Pleading.
5. Anger.
6. Goofy non-sequiter distraction (this is Kyle).
7. I'm quitting. Do what you want.
8. Short pause, then repeat from #1.

We're at 4 now.

poorpete · Post by **poorpete** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 11:19 am

This is like when getting cc'd on an email with 100 people and after a dozen responses it's just constant replies of "stop hitting reply all!"

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 11:46 am

Wait, why are there two threads with the same title?

Kyle · Post by **Kyle** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 2:20 pm

Yeah- it's not a joke! It's a mistake! And now Mike's trying to make it into a conspiracy and make me look like an asshole worse than I already am. This is bullshit. Stop posting here. THIS IS NOT A DEATHLESS THREAD!

Post by **Mike** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 2:22 pm

You. Are. Soooooo. Beautiful.... To me.

Kyle · Post by **Kyle** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 2:46 pm

Fuck you. You're making everyone think this is a whole thing that it's not. Now you're the problem and you're making everyone think that I'm the problem and I DON'T FUCKING APPRECIATE IT.

Eliahad · Post by **Eliahad** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 4:28 pm

... You don't appreciate you have to keep the bit going? But it's comedy gold!

Post by **Mike** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 5:34 pm

I'm sorry, Kyle. Tell you what... how about I just keep the camera focused on your face? I promise I won't move.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 10:40 pm

Kyle wrote: ↑Fri Apr 22, 2022 2:20 pm And now Mike's trying to make it into a conspiracy and make me look like an asshole worse than I already am.

Should we be inferring from this that you think you're an a****** but just not a worse one? Come on man, you're not that bad. Maybe you doubt yourself after a hard week in the office where you have to be an a****** on purpose but that doesn't mean it's who you really are.

Post by **Mike** » Fri Apr 22, 2022 11:22 pm

You know Kyle, you sure are cute when you're angry.

Kyle · Post by **Kyle** » Sat Apr 23, 2022 5:24 am

Phoebe wrote: ↑Fri Apr 22, 2022 10:40 pm
Kyle wrote: ↑Fri Apr 22, 2022 2:20 pm And now Mike's trying to make it into a conspiracy and make me look like an asshole worse than I already am.
Should we be inferring from this that you think you're an a****** but just not a worse one? Come on man, you're not that bad. Maybe you doubt yourself after a hard week in the office where you have to be an a****** on purpose but that doesn't mean it's who you really are.

Aww. Thanks. Its times like these that I like to kick back with a large glass of merlot, air out my tootsies and watch the wiener dog races on ESPN 8. Its nice to be seen. Its nice to be understood.

Eliahad · Post by **Eliahad** » Sat Apr 23, 2022 10:46 am

Heh heh, wiener.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Sat Apr 23, 2022 10:50 am

Eliahad wrote: ↑Sat Apr 23, 2022 10:46 amHeh heh, wiener.

I don't watch that type of thing. I don't want the patriarchal, exploitative sex industry to have free space in my neurons. Watch a nature show instead. I can't guarantee results; I only can report from the other side.

Eliahad · Post by **Eliahad** » Sat Apr 23, 2022 10:54 am

I started watching a nature show. It was really interesting for awhile... Then I suddenly lost interest.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Sat Apr 23, 2022 11:52 am

Hmmm. It's supposed to be interesting and get more and more interesting and then just kind of stay interesting forever? Or indefinitely?

Eliahad · Post by **Eliahad** » Sat Apr 23, 2022 12:44 pm

Interesting! I'm clearly being interested incorrectly.

Kyle · Post by **Kyle** » Sat Apr 23, 2022 4:17 pm

Okay, I see what you're all doing. Stop. I'm walking away from this thread. You should too.

Post by **Mike** » Sat Apr 23, 2022 4:26 pm

This is it! It's a walk-out!! Everybody follow Kyle!

Eliahad · Post by **Eliahad** » Sun Apr 24, 2022 12:21 am

You guys stay safe, I'll just make sure no one sneaks in and kills the thread while you're gone.

Eliahad · Post by **Eliahad** » Sun Apr 24, 2022 2:06 pm

Oh, I guess I was the traitor. Sorry, thread.

Post by **Mike** » Sun Apr 24, 2022 2:27 pm

Technically, Pete posted up earlier because he had his time zone mixed up and thought the thread was dead already. When he realized his error, he deleted his post. Technically, deleting a post is not allowed under unkillable threads rules, so if this actually were a competition thread, I would restore that post and it would still be going. But since this ISN'T the real Deathless thread, we can just let it sit here.

Eliahad · Post by **Eliahad** » Sun Apr 24, 2022 3:01 pm

Oh, well...carry on then.

Post by **Mike** » Sun Apr 24, 2022 3:38 pm

But now Kyle has gotten his wish: we have official confirmation that this isn't a real Deathless thread, because if it was, then it would still be open, but that 14 hour gap proves it's not real, so everyone can finally give up and quit posting, and then Kyle can be happy.

Kyle · Post by **Kyle** » Sun Apr 24, 2022 4:38 pm

Well you guys fucked it up. I guess Eli won the thread. Good work. You fucking bozos.

Eliahad · Post by **Eliahad** » Mon Apr 25, 2022 8:28 pm

*double deuce!*

Post by **Mike** » Sun May 29, 2022 10:46 pm

Good morning?

Tahlvin · Post by **Tahlvin** » Mon May 30, 2022 4:06 am

Not this again?!

Post by **Mike** » Tue Jun 14, 2022 10:43 am

Sorry. This is all I have now. I can't trust the other thread, so I will post here until it dies.

Eliahad · Post by **Eliahad** » Tue Jun 14, 2022 11:02 am

Works for me.

Tahlvin · Post by **Tahlvin** » Tue Jun 14, 2022 11:08 am

You have to be true to yourself.

Post by **Mike** » Tue Jun 14, 2022 4:55 pm

Thank you! It's nice to have people around you who know how to be supportive.

Eliahad · Post by **Eliahad** » Tue Jun 14, 2022 7:04 pm

Awwwwww.

Eliahad · Post by **Eliahad** » Wed Jun 15, 2022 9:02 am

I won!