Sober posting

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Mon Mar 22, 2021 8:37 pm

I want to drink just so I can congratulate Darcs on his attempt to reason with the Kafkaesque forces of pandemic governance, but I have too much work to do and too much migraine. Argh. Give em hell!

Stan · Post by **Stan** » Mon Mar 22, 2021 8:46 pm

I'm ice cream drunk for the first time in a month so I'll have to egg on Darcs from here.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Mon Mar 22, 2021 8:55 pm

Ugh shut up about ice cream I have 2 sherbets and 1 mint chip in this house and can't touch either one because death may come for us all but I do NOT have the energy needed to buy bigger pants and a line had to be drawn. What is any of it for? Why was food made to be good if it can hurt you? $-$#&#+$(_+_!

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Mon Mar 22, 2021 8:56 pm

LOL drunk Darcs is quality stuff. What is a swiss roll? Like a little Debbie?

Stan · Post by **Stan** » Mon Mar 22, 2021 9:01 pm

Phoebe wrote: ↑Mon Mar 22, 2021 8:55 pm What is any of it for? Why was food made to be good if it can hurt you? $-$#&#+$(_+_!

I believer our tastes evolved when starvation was by far the bigger problem - 'hey, eat all that fat so you have the energy to make it through the winter without dying.' We're the victims of our own success.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Mon Mar 22, 2021 9:19 pm

You f****** make money so that you can buy the ice cream and then you eat the ice cream and then you can't eat the ice cream anymore and it wrecks your life.

Stan · Post by **Stan** » Mon Mar 22, 2021 9:23 pm

Phoebe wrote: ↑Mon Mar 22, 2021 9:19 pm You f****** make money so that you can buy the ice cream and then you eat the ice cream and then you can't eat the ice cream anymore and it wrecks your life.

Damn, that's the modern conundrum in a nutshell.

Tahlvin · Post by **Tahlvin** » Tue Mar 23, 2021 5:02 am

Dude, I love Little Debbie Swiss Cake Rolls! They are best when they have been refrigerated. Then the cream filling becomes more like ice cream, and you're eating a rolled up ice cream sandwich.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Tue Mar 23, 2021 7:07 am

Lightly refrigerated. I can dwell on it mentally; there's no little debbie here and she can't come in unless I invite her myself, so no danger.

poorpete · Post by **poorpete** » Tue Mar 23, 2021 9:58 am

Is the rule that if you read a drunk post but want to respond, you write it here?

Post by **Mike** » Tue Mar 23, 2021 10:01 am

That seems to be the workaround.

Post by **Mike** » Tue Mar 23, 2021 10:02 am

Alternately, you can get drunk and respond in the drunk thread.

DMDarcs · Post by **DMDarcs** » Tue Mar 23, 2021 11:35 am

Phoebe wrote: ↑Mon Mar 22, 2021 8:56 pm LOL drunk Darcs is quality stuff. What is a swiss roll? Like a little Debbie?

No, drunk Darcs is actually an abomination against Man and God and really shouldn't be allowed to exist.

Akiva · Post by **Akiva** » Tue Mar 23, 2021 11:54 am

Should there be a separate hung over posting thread?

Stan · Post by **Stan** » Tue Mar 23, 2021 12:13 pm

Akiva wrote: ↑Tue Mar 23, 2021 11:54 am Should there be a separate hung over posting thread?

There is. It's the rest of the forum.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Tue Mar 23, 2021 12:32 pm

DMDarcs wrote: ↑Tue Mar 23, 2021 11:35 am
Phoebe wrote: ↑Mon Mar 22, 2021 8:56 pm LOL drunk Darcs is quality stuff. What is a swiss roll? Like a little Debbie?
No, drunk Darcs is actually an abomination against Man and God and really shouldn't be allowed to exist.

My goodness, what exactly did you do later that night?! I think abomination against man is pretty easy to accomplish but against God? While drunk?

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Sat Apr 17, 2021 7:23 pm

I'm cracking open my wine bottle in hopes of being able to tell fortunes later, In about 40 minutes. Probably the reality is I will fall asleep before 9:00 and snore like the thundering of the banquet hall in Valhalla.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Sun Apr 18, 2021 6:15 am

Prediction was correct though made it to about 11 pm beforehand. The dreams were EPIC though; after many nights of exhausted, dreamless sleep, had about a four hour dream of BTS performing the other night (while the concert actually played under my bed because the phone fell down there and husband was on trip so nobody found it until I woke thinking the very walls were vibrating with sound); then last night drank three white wine spritzers (about 9 oz wine), the drink of the old dehydrated lady who doesn't want to open the good wine, and had hours of vivid dreams. They were top quality dreams. The main thread connecting all of them was going to a liquor store to select a specific prized bottle of booze with a buddy (a younger woman I don't even know very well but apparently she seemed like a good prospect for a drinking buddy) and then going to one party after another with my friend trading shots from the bottle in question. It was hilarious - like each party had its own funny story, after which we would regroup, drink, and move to the next one. One had everyone in early 1800s England (not just in dress, that's where they were from), except us in our 2021 attire. Each entry was better than the last; the last one was the best and then the bottle was empty and I woke. Lesson: the brain wants more drinking.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Sun Apr 18, 2021 11:28 pm

Two days of trying, and incapable of escaping sobriety despite the minimal intake likely required. Distracted by Tasks, or Sleep. It is now a project: I am going to drink. When? How? Don't know but let us see how long it takes. The rules: have to get 2-3 drinks in or equivalent, as I think this would do the job. Cannot pass out immediately afterward.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Sun Apr 25, 2021 1:26 am

So close today - opened the bottle of wine and got most of the way through it but then my husband came and drank the last two glasses and I just didn't have the heart to open a new bottle. And whatever the amount was up to the last two glasses was just slightly insufficient. Fun project though - I will keep working on it with great determination until I can get it solved.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Tue Apr 27, 2021 5:06 pm

Another report from my daily and consistently failed struggle to avoid being sober: I have purchased 80 calorie Pinot grigio to make white wine spritzers with carbonated flavored water. The idea is to drink this throughout the evening after school, thus retaining functionality in case I should be called into sober service, and then if plans look good for the rest of the evening, I can suddenly finish off the rest of the bottle and hopefully achieve my end. And nobody wants to drink that 80 calorie Pinot grigio in this house except me, so there's no risk of anyone else finishing it off before I can get to it. Win.

I might be able to do this tonight because my kid got a small injury and I took him to McDonald's as a treat, so he is all fed and I don't need to make anyone a dinner tonight. There will be no use of knives or anything that can burn down the house. That little guy also ate down three quarter pounders one after the other, like it was absolutely nothing. I'm not sure I could even do that physically if you gave me an hour and let me vomit afterward. Where is he putting this in his actual physical body? There is not room for a three-quarter pounder sized space in his body.

Tahlvin · Post by **Tahlvin** » Wed Apr 28, 2021 4:57 am

My kids' are/were swimmers, they could scarf down two Big Macs, large fries, and large milkshake without blinking. I could do the same when I was in track and cross country. Those were the days...

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Wed Apr 28, 2021 10:44 pm

Used the Pinot as cooking wine. It is almost comedy at this point; it's like a 20 year old going through detailed machinations to acquire alcohol but being thwarted at every turn. Tomorrow is a new day, new effort, but I need to drive to many things so now we're looking at Friday.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Thu Apr 29, 2021 11:55 pm

That was prescient.
It's too darn hot
Says the mighty ox
I'd like to sup ... white wine spritzer tonight
Refill the cup with wine spritzer tonight
I'd like an accurate temperature, right?
But can't climb up even one lousy flight
Of stairs when my body is boiling tonight
'Cause it's too darn hot
It's too darn hot
It's too darn hot
I'd like to cool down this fever tonight
Ditch infection with medicinal flights
I'd like to pop several advil tonight
Bacteria, virus, or menopause fights
The waters flow out of all skin pores tonight
'Cause it's too darn hot
According to the covid report, ev'ry feverish ox you know
Much prefers her merlot, whisky, and port
When the temperature is low
But when the thermometer goes 'way up
And the forehead is sizzling hot
Legging pants for this ox are not
'Cause it's too, too, too darn hot
It's too darn hot…

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Wed May 05, 2021 10:31 am

I have yet to reach a point where I can have two full drinks in one 8 hour span of time. Have not abandoned the project. It is now an interesting experiment to see what kind of control over my own life and schedule is still possible!

bralbovsky · Post by **bralbovsky** » Wed May 05, 2021 10:34 pm

For future consideration, Yellowtail (white or red) comes in an extra large bottle, no doubt to accommodate interlopers.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Wed May 05, 2021 11:04 pm

That is a good point. I've seen these very large bottles of wine. Or I could just drink whisky which ultimately is a better plan. The wine spritzer was a concession to occasionally needing to drive unexpectedly. My goal for summer is to be able to wander around doing a certain amount of drunken gardening. I used to have a landlord who did this type of drunken gardening and it seemed delightful. I did not as much appreciate his urination in the garden but to be fair it would have been a hike into the house and there he was. I will doubtless find it easy to avoid this potential downside and the main thing is simply to avoid knives.

Akiva · Post by **Akiva** » Mon May 10, 2021 4:15 pm

Can’t stop thinking about the person I wish I’d never met.

This may turn to drunk posting in a few hours.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Mon May 10, 2021 10:41 pm

It's a Monday! It's supposed to be bad. I have a video for you to be posted in the other thread. I mean it's not specifically for you, just that I hope you will find it diverting.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Thu May 13, 2021 7:46 pm

I don't know if any of you will remember this but several years ago I had a best buddy, a very close friend, we were very close for about a decade, we were besties, she was my BFF, I spent many an hour with this nice, caring person. I elevated her to a level as close as one could get to family without being that. And then this woman totally ghosted me off the face of the Earth, and now under circumstances that I do not wish to describe because of their enormous doxxing potential, she has induced her husband to invite me to their house for an event. I am just beyond beyond beyond beyond in the total lack of understanding. What is it with people? Still not the slightest clue what I could have done to offend this woman and cause her to completely cut off contact with me for all these years, which I believe caused my children about as much pain as it did to me. Then she started sending a holiday card with customary braggies about her kids. That was apparently a good safe distance for me to be kept at: the recipient of a holiday card, but nothing more. It was apparently a matter of great curiosity how our children were turning out, comparatively speaking.
I'm still too busy to drink. When the floodgate breaks loose it should be particularly epic.

Post by **Mike** » Thu May 13, 2021 8:10 pm

I remember this very well (relative to how well I normally remember things from that long ago). IIRC, you discussed it in the context of how much effort you should put into someone who was clearly ghosting you. You really just wanted a reason, but didn't want to put yourself too far out there in the face of likely continued rejection.

You are not asking for opinions, but I will offer that there is no wrong decision here. You owe her no emotional investment. Ignore her and you are right. Try to see what the fuck is going on just to satisfy your own curiosity, and you are also right. You don't need my support, but I support whatever you choose anyway.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Thu May 13, 2021 11:48 pm

So nice of you to say so, thank you, that is very kind. You would think at this age we do better but, you know, nothing is new under the sun, just older and with more perspective from which to view it in that longer angle.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Sun May 16, 2021 12:29 pm

Finally! I achieved a mild state of intoxication after the most stressful week/day/month/year by seizing upon a bottle of pre-prepared margaritas and drinking it down like juice. It did not take much; I have completely erased any alcohol tolerance I had built up. However, I believe the bottle was "old" because now I have a terrible stomachache despite no other signs of hangover - for me that would be a headache #1. Stomachache rare in this situation. The plan of drinking did not turn out well at all. Maybe i need drugs. I am very opposed to illegal drugs but nobody is making legal drugs of the kind the people need. Why is this? Where is my Soma?

bralbovsky · Post by **bralbovsky** » Mon May 17, 2021 5:21 pm

https://www.drugs.com/carisoprodol.html Well, Soma is a thing, but nowhere near what we were promised.

With zero data, the returning friend thing has a whiff of Amway to me. We won't ghost you regardless of errors or fame.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Sun May 30, 2021 10:09 pm

Feeling hopeful because it's still early and I had to open a bottle of Sauvignon Blanc to deglaze a pan of spicy Cajun garlic shrimp! Let's see what I can do. Went for a very long walk and am desperate for some form of relaxation.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Sat Jun 26, 2021 9:27 pm

I almost never fight with my children and I never fight with my middle child, who is the most rational one in the house (well, we haven't tested the cats). But now I'm fighting with my middle child about LAUNDRY, of all things, and I think she owes me an apology and she's not speaking to me because she's mad at me. I'm actually depressed about it. I attempted to apologize to her for whatever wrongs she thinks I have committed, but she refuses to discuss and that is that. I know what wrongs she has committed: destroying and thwarting every aspect of a normal laundry process, and then acting like it's my fault somehow! I lay here in the darkness. Only the dog loves me. The drink is too far away but maybe I will get up and go downstairs and find the scotch. Over ... Laundry. Over laundry my daughter is mad and not speaking to me. And she is the one who is wrong, by the way.

Akiva · Post by **Akiva** » Sun Jun 27, 2021 8:55 pm

I’m feeling incredibly passive—like I don’t do anything, and things just happen. The only thing that connects these things together is that I’m in the room for all of them.

And my feet and back hurt.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Wed Jul 14, 2021 1:18 am

The cold medicine has had no impact. I object. If we were serious about happiness we would have done so much better with developing comforting medicines and non-addictive somas. I was promised soma, I was told there would be spice. There's nothing ... nothing but painful drainage.

Akiva · Post by **Akiva** » Wed Jul 14, 2021 9:15 am

Phoebe wrote: ↑Wed Jul 14, 2021 1:18 am The cold medicine has had no impact. I object. If we were serious about happiness we would have done so much better with developing comforting medicines and non-addictive somas. I was promised soma, I was told there would be spice. There's nothing ... nothing but painful drainage.

If they can make machines to save us labor
Someday they’ll do our hearts the very same favor
The wails of ruined lives brought to a halt by
The serene hum of computers in air-conditioned vaults

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Thu Jul 15, 2021 12:13 pm

You got it. My phone is such a busybody but even it has nothing on the car. You think between the two of them they could detect when I'm not doing well and offer me some kind of soothing cocktail.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Mon Sep 06, 2021 1:47 pm

Last night I poured myself luckily a very small bit of the very good whisky, took a few sips of it, got myself all propped up in bed on the pillows, and immediately passed out. I completely forgot the rest of the whiskey was there until just now when I found it. It's such a tiny amount but I don't want to throw it down the drain, but can it still be drunk? Eeeewwww I don't know.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Wed Sep 08, 2021 10:31 pm

The answer to this one turned out to be No. Don't drink it. I was drinking but have regained my sobriety. I read an article about how avoidance of booze is one of the great healthy habits of aging, and I recognize a strong correlation between past "posts in drunk post thread" and "depressed". We don't want this correlation! On the other hand, most of my drinking happened on a calendar at annual events that always occured. I probably drank so much less during COVID year simply due to being with kids all the time and not attending the usual annual social events. Anyway, I want to drink AND eat and I object to the whole notion that one must restrain such behaviors so excessively in order to achieve fitness in our old age. What is the right balance? I don't know. I come from a long (like, ten generations long) line of bar owners. What gives? I wasn't meant to live as an unwilling teetotaler.

Akiva · Post by **Akiva** » Thu Sep 09, 2021 1:09 pm

Phoebe wrote: ↑Wed Sep 08, 2021 10:31 pm I recognize a strong correlation between past "posts in drunk post thread" and "depressed".

I have no idea what you're talking about.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Thu Sep 09, 2021 5:10 pm

Oooohhhhh I was not referring to others although we could go and inspect your correlation!! We will not do such a thing. But in my case there was definitely a correlation. Let us know if you want empirical scrutiny of your correlations!

Akiva · Post by **Akiva** » Thu Sep 09, 2021 8:06 pm

I usually am feeling low when I drunk post, but I’m almost always feeling terrible about myself, so I don’t think there is a correlation. Although being drunk might make me more likely to post about such feelings.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Sun Nov 28, 2021 7:34 pm

My husband stuffs tissues into a nostril and lets it sit there to Absorb. He wants to develop and sell a custom product for this purpose. He wants to know why I do Not use this superior Technique. I am drinking decaf coffee with milk (half my daily caloric intake appears to be milk). I cannot drink alcohol. At all. For a long time. No breaks.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Mon Jan 17, 2022 2:20 pm

Sober me observes that drunk me has almost zero self-awareness! That's probably why I'm jolly, except for that one horrible moment when self-awareness crept in! Otherwise it was all happy drunk-watching of The King: Eternal Monarch and finishing a puzzle. It was all happy, IN THEORY!

Akiva · Post by **Akiva** » Sun Feb 13, 2022 2:36 pm

I can't say I've had any conversations with Nietzsche; I think Phoebe must be more worthy.

I have dreamed about Nietzsche research, but not in a happy way.

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Sun Feb 13, 2022 6:51 pm

Akiva wrote: ↑Sun Feb 13, 2022 2:36 pm I can't say I've had any conversations with Nietzsche; I think Phoebe must be more worthy.

I have dreamed about Nietzsche research, but not in a happy way.

Well to be fair we did not converse; rather, I sang him a song about his eyes. I don't know what he thought of it - I was worried he would find it stupid but then I realized, he is no crack composer either. We are on a level together in that regard. We did have an understanding though - we were sharing some thoughts.

Don't ask me why it happens; I don't make this stuff up deliberately! I'm the victim of this brain too!

Phoebe · Post by **Phoebe** » Sun Feb 13, 2022 11:27 pm

I'm eating cold eomuk / fish cake in spicy sauce and it's so good i think this should be in the drunk posting thread. What life is this where I'm this old and just discovering cold spicy fish cakes? I need to live near the ocean.